New parents need a lot to get started, and a baby shower is one of the best ways to help make that happen. It’s a way for friends and family of the parents to demonstrate their support, as well. For some people, holding a shower for a second baby was not considered proper, as the parents probably already had most of the items they needed. However, it is no longer improper to hold a shower for a second baby, as long as you make a few adjustments.

Instead of a full shower, you could host a mini-shower, where guests only bring those necessities that every baby has to have – bath accessories, undershirts, diapers, etc. You might ask the parents to list whatever items they never got or need to replace from the first time around. Another idea is to have a shower dedicated to the mom, where guests bring gifts that will help her relax during the last weeks of her pregnancy and after the birth. She’ll appreciate receiving something soothing like aromatherapy candles, or even something for day-to-day use, like a soft robe.

Another great idea is to have a mom-focused shower – but reminding her that she’s not just a mom, with gifts that are for her alone, like romantic perfume or a bit of sexy (supporting!) lingerie. You can, on your own or with other guests, purchase a gift certificate for a full day at the salon or some other special event – but be sure to prearrange babysitting, too. You can also have a strategic meeting with the father-to-be and the closest friends and family of the mom before the party, in order to make up a helping hands calendar.

There are many things you can do that will be appreciated, like getting the house organized while mom and baby are in the hospital, taking the older child to and from school (especially during that first week) or helping mom and dad juggle kids while doing errands. After being sure to get down all the names and phone numbers of the helpers, present the finished calendar to mom at the shower. There are situations where neither baby nor mom are in need of any new items. You might decide to mark the upcoming birth with a straightforward party with friends and oved ones.

You may want to ask the guests to bring baby items for donation to a women’s charitable organization. You might also ask everyone to bring small portions of prepared food that can be frozen or stored (this is known as a “freezer party”). This will be of great help to the mom as she gets closer to her due date and during the first week or so after the birth. Obviously, you’ll want to check with mom to see if she has adequate room in her freezer for al the goodies, as well as select a party date close to her delivery date.

Do keep in mind that in the case of caboose babies (a “caboose” baby is born several years after the next-oldest sibling), a full shower can be held with no impropriety. A lot of moms and dads won’t likely have even the big items (cribs, etc.), anymore, or they could be outdated in terms of safety requirements.

Even if the baby shower is small or minor in terms of gift-giving, the most important thing to remember is that it is an opportunity to show the mom-to-be your love for her and her little one.

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